Changes in the family

My brother, Steve, and his wife, Michele, recently moved from Indiana to Crystal Lake, IL, after almost four years in Upland, IN. It's nice to have them nearer to Michele's parents, especially when Michele isn't feeling so well. They seem to like where they live very much and, tho' Steve wasn't too excited about resuming the work he'd left in order to move to Indiana (his old company hired him back), it was important for them to be closer to family. It's also nice that they aren't having to go so short of money all of the time, since he's paid a better salary with the current job. Of course, living in the Chicago-area means they will have a much higher cost of living!

Mother and I hope to go up there one weekend this month so that Steve, Michele, Keegan (their oldest) and Michele's parents and brother can go to the Blue Man Group show. We'll watch the three youngest kids for them, so they can all have an evening out. I'm really looking forward to seeing all of the kids.

Also, my twin brother Dan has accepted a job in Waukegan, IL, which will mean that he's about three hours nearer to us than where he currently lives, near Nashville. I'm really glad he's gotten what sounds like a great job, but he'd also interviewed at a local hospital (near our hometown) and I'd gotten my hopes up that he'd move back home. So, honestly & selfishly, I was a little disappointed, as well. I miss him a great deal since he is my closest friend in the family; not just biologically! :) I guess I feel ambivalent; I'm really thankful that he is progressing in his career, but wish he was closer to home. At least, he IS much closer to home, just not as close as I'd like. Oh well, God knows our needs and is there to comfort when we're feeling lost and alone.

White Sox (booo)

No, really I'm glad for those poor South-siders! It's good that they finally get some joy in their lives! I have to say, tho', that I'm really hopeful that the Cards will overcome their post-season slump and get into the Series. If they do get in, I'll definitely be rooting for the Cards to win. Despite having lived in the Chicago-area for so many years, I’ve always loved the Cards (mainly because the town I grew up in was made up of Card fans being so much closer to St. Louis than to Chicago). I’m currently an avid Cub’s fan and have been for a long time. There's just something about their being perennial losers which makes me long for them to win. I know some day the Cubbies will win it all, so until that day comes, I’ll keep on cheering them on. Never will I switch to the Sox!

Update on Linda

I few months ago I spoke of my sister-in-law, Linda, and how she’d fractured her elbow. I thought I’d write an update for anyone who’s been praying for her. The initial recommendation was that she’d need to have surgery to repair the radial head (the point where the forearm meets the elbow). However, when she was seen by the orthopod, he said they could try to just leave it to heal by itself since the bones were aligned relatively correctly. He said if it didn’t work, they could then do the surgery.

Well, it turns out that she’s done fairly well, at least so far. She’s an extremely courageous and tough person and has gone these few months without even a splint on her arm. She’s gained increasing movement and is almost back to normal now, praise God.

Mother

My Mother has gone through some recent tough times with severe arthritis in her right knee. The specialist initially thought it was just tendonitis (extremely painful but should heal by itself) but they did a CT scan and this showed she also had the arthritis. Turns out she’s somewhat bow-legged and this has caused the arthritis to be much more severe than usual. The orthopod said that she’d need to have knee replacements (probably in both knees) in a year or so, but that she should try and hold off as long as possible. She’s struggled with a great deal of pain in that knee, however, and recently asked her doctor why she had to wait so long for a replacement if they already know that it’ll have to be done. Her doctor explained that knee replacement joints usually only last ten years so they try to put off doing it for as long as possible to avoid having to do it more than once.

I think it’s harder for Mother to except this because she’s already had one joint replacement when she fractured her elbow more than fifteen years ago. She’s had almost no problems with that elbow since so it makes it harder to accept that she’d have problems with the knee. I think, in some ways, that it would be better for her to have the surgery now when she’s relatively healthy, but it’s not my choice to make, obviously. Please pray for her.

Elsie

My niece, Elsie, gets cuter everyday. She’s gotten used to the fact that I generally carry candy in my pockets, on the off chance that I’ll meet up with the kids. Today, when I stopped by the town library, I was on my way into work so didn’t have any candy in my pockets. Elsie & her mum were at the library and she was too polite to ask me if I had any candy on me. When the librarian asked her if she liked her “Auntie Debbie”, I jokingly said, “Well, she likes the fact that I usually have candy in my pockets!” Elsie decided she had to check this out for herself, and came to give me a hug. I burst out laughing when the hug actually turned out to be a pat down of my pockets! What a scalawag she is!

Old Friends

Came across a dear friend, from years ago, on the web today, someone who was really special to me when I was a young woman. Her name is Ruth Ann and I used to baby-sit her kids when they were small (they lived in the house directly behind ours, so I could just go through the back fence). Ruth Ann was special because she was always kind to me and was a safe shoulder to cry on when I was confused and upset (as most teenagers are). Ruth Ann was probably my closest friend at that time in my life. She had two lovely boys, as well, and I really enjoyed spending time with them.

I've not heard from Ruth Ann in years. I am and always have been a poor correspondence, so when she wrote to me several years ago, I never got back to her, to my shame. I heard from mutual friends that she'd been inquiring about me, but didn't really have any way of reaching her until now. I am really excited about the possibility of seeing her again, sometime soon. She has been in my thoughts and prayers for a long time... One of the great things about finding her photo on the web was seeing her wonderful smile again; the kind of smile which made you grin when you saw it. She has this gorgeous, infectious laugh, as well. Seeing the picture brought all of this back and made me realize how much I've missed her.

Thankfulness

“The worst moment in an atheist’s life is when he is filled with thankfulness but realizes he has no-one to thank!”
G. K. Chesterton

Incident in the life of wonderful old gospel-preacher, Vance Havner; known for his fervent love of Christ, his ability to preach the true Gospel, and, occasionally, his saltiness:
One Lord’s Day, after the service, Pastor Havnor shook hands with a parishioner and asked this fellow how he was. The parishioner said, “Oh, I’m pretty good, under the circumstances”. Pastor Havner asked, “What I want to know is, what is a Christian doing under the circumstances, anyway?”

Here’s another of his quotes I read tonight, based on Hebrews 11:
“Moses saw the invisible, chose the imperishable and did the impossible.”

Finally, the following gave me such comfort after my Dad’s death, three years ago. I was struggling with a sense of helplessness and anger at the suffering he'd experienced in the last six days of his life. I picked up one of Vance Havner's books and turned right to a passage where he spoke of his agony, as he sat by his wife's bedside, watching her pass into the presence of the Lord. He couldn't understand why she'd suffered so much and as he spoke of his anger and hurt at what she was having to pass through, He heard his wife whisper, “One minute in the presence of the Lord is worth a lifetime of suffering”.

The general theme of these passages is we have much to be thankful for; something I lose sight of on a continuing basis. The other day I came across a sort of love letter I’d written regarding my Dad, after he died. In it I speak of all that I discovered I had to be thankful for in the circumstances surrounding his demise. At some point, when I get up enough courage, I’ll share it here…

Neat Photos of CAC and JT

Someone who'd spoken with my Grandfather, Stanley McCallum, in the late '70's noticed his picture in my blog. Mr. Van Costen has written a couple of lovely notes to me and with the most recent letter, he sent these two photos. I think this one is lovely because it shows how tender Mr. Coates was; just looking at his eyes shows his love for the Lord and His people. This photo made me want to read more of his ministry, possibly because it's made him more of a real person to me.


I thought this was also a cool picture. It is of Mr. James Taylor when he was sixteen years old. Ironically, my Mother has a copy of this same photo, only she didn't know who it was; she thought it was one of her brothers dressed up in old-time clothes! Thank you for sending these, Mr. Costen, & I will write to you soon!

Phillipians 4:8-Tribute to Mother

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Php 4:8

I have been thinking about this scripture most of the night. In the last couple of days, I’ve had some of the worst pain I’ve experienced in months over my right kidney. For some reason, even tho’ I live with severe pain on a daily basis, when the pain escalates past a certain point, it’s hard not to think of anything else. Of course, this is the worst thing that can happen because, in my experience, if I can distract myself in some way, the pain becomes at least a little more bearable. So, I began thinking again of this scripture and was reminded of many things in my past which, tho’ hard at the time, were a blessing to me. I also remembered the one person who’s been with me throughout each of my hospitalizations and has tried her best to ease my pain, if only being present for these terribly painful times; this person is my Mother.

Despite her own severe health issues, my mom has gone out of her way on a continuing basis to be available for me when I’ve had to undergo surgery. At times she’s argued with the doctors when they wouldn’t believe my complaints of severe pain. Other times, she’s just been there to hold my hand when no-one else could be. She’s fought to have the doctors/surgeons do what was best for me. Mommy’s even sat with me during long hours & days of doctors appointments at Mayo Clinic.

One of the best stories I remember about Mother’s quiet ferocity in attempting to make sure I received the care I needed was after my last major surgery on my right kidney, in 1997. I was at a strange hospital (Froedtert Memorial), in a strange town (Milwaukee, WI) having moved there to begin a contract at the Milwaukee Children’s Hospital as a traveling nurse. When I’d been there only four days and was scheduled to start my first day of work in the morning, I realized that my right kidney/ureter was obstructed because I had this horrendous pain; pain which had occurred on my left side six months before, when my left kidney/ureter was obstructed from recurring post-hysterectomy endometriosis.

I tried to drive myself to the hospital but found I could hardly breath from the pain. There was an accident on the road leading to the hospital and I came close to stopping the police and asking them to call an ambulance to take me the rest of the way. I managed to make it to the hospital and was seen immediately because it was obvious the pain was worse than anything I can describe. After they diagnosed the obstruction, I was told I’d need to have surgery to bypass it; the endometriosis had returned and grown around the ureter, closing it off. I’d had so many surgeries, the last one only six months previous, and I decided to try to fight having this one. So a a nephrostomy tube was placed in my right kidney and I started my job at the Children’s Hospital, with a bag hanging from my right flank which drained my kidney, temporarily bypassing the obstruction.

About a week later, I was still in tremendous pain, tho’ it had been relieved to some degree by the nephrostomy tube. Endometriosis is a horror in that, tho’ one aspect of it may improve via intervention, the underlying pain of the disease is still there. I couldn’t take the pain any longer, so surgery was scheduled. Thankfully, my Mother was sitting by the bedside when I was brought back from surgery. The surgeons had placed a central line in my right internal jugular (the major vein in my neck) because I’d had so many surgeries I no longer had very good venous access in my hands/arms. When the surgeons came by after the surgery, they brought good news; they said they’d not had to do the extensive revisions of the kidney and ureters they thought they’d have to do prior to surgery. This was good because it meant, hopefully, I’d need less healing time and there wouldn’t be as much scar tissue to worry about.

When I could get a word in edgewise, over their excitement, I told them that I was having terrible pain. They immediately said, “Well, you just had major surgery so it’s normal to have pain.” I said, “You don’t understand! I’ve had nine major surgeries in the past ten years, so I know what it feels like to have pain after surgery! This pain is above and beyond anything I’ve felt before, post-surgery!” The doctors tried to explain that my expectations regarding pain-relief were too great; that I was getting large doses of morphine thru my central line. At this point, my Mother quietly spoke up and said, “Excuse me, but is it normal for blood to be pouring out of that IV line in her neck?” The doctors became quite agitated at this point, discovering that the line had not been connected properly, so not only was I losing blood through a major neck vein, all of the “large doses of morphine” were pouring out onto the bed! No wonder I was in such pain!! I shudder to think about how long I would have lain suffering if she hadn’t been there and spoken up in my defense.

This is only one of several times my Mother has intervened on my behalf. I will always be thankful she was there looking out for me. I love my Mom very much and am thankful for all she does for me on a continuing basis, day to day. I love her tender heart and her desire to do God’s will. I love the way she prays for those she loves, especially the children. It’s not uncommon for me to find her on her knees beside her bed in the middle of the day after receiving a phone call or other message regarding friends, grand-kids and other family members whom she loves who are in trouble or pain.

I once told her, when I was a child, that I wanted to grow up to be like her some day. I’ll always remember how she cried, saying, “You don’t want to be like me, sweetheart.” It was a day when she was overwhelmed by her kids, trying to run a household pretty much on her own since my dad was gone much of the time, and full-time work. Well, I am here to say, “Mother, I still want to grow up to be like you!”

Macro shots of Orchids

Also wanted to share some experimental shots I got while using my macro lens. This is my niece's orchid; Josie was given it by Joe, her heart's desire (Joe, not the orchid).

Josie & Zippy

Josie & Zippy
Originally uploaded by ragamuffin.

Josie holding Ben's cat, Zippy. Aren't her dimples amazing? (Josie's dimples, NOT the cat's!)

Being Subpoenaed

I had the frightening experience, day before yesterday, of getting a phone call from the State's Attorney's Office, wanting me to return their call (I was at work). Even though I've never done anything illegal and should have felt at peace, I began suddenly to worry about unpaid hospital bills at Carle Hospital in Urbana, IL; wondering whether they'd gotten sick of waiting for me to pay them and now they were suing! This was especially worrisome because Carle is notoriously nasty about bills (despite what they get written up about them in the News-Gazette, our local paper!)

Turns out, however, that I'd been a witness to some boys who'd robbed a girl and attempted to use one of her checks to pay for some CDs, when I worked at Borders. I was being contacted so I could come in and help them in their case against the kids. What a RELIEF! It's funny how you can be innocent yet feel SO guilty when your phoned by someone like them. I couldn't help laughing, but also said a big, "THANK YOU, Dearest Lord", when I got off the phone. :-)

A REALLY Bad Day

My sister-in-law, Linda, who is the toughest, most courageous person I've ever known, had a terrible day today. Just before I left for work this morning, I received a phone call from a friend, Emily, who was at Lin's house. She said Lin had fallen from a step ladder and that her arm "hurt really bad". Could I come & check it out?

Of course, I went over immediately and found Linda sweating, pale, and in terrible pain, but her usual laughing self, otherwise. When I tried to gently straighten her arm out to test it's range of motion, I could feel that she'd broken it by the grating under my fingers (called crepitus in medical terminology). Also, she couldn't extend more than a few inches. I told LIn what I'd found and she needed to go to the hospital immediately. Of course, she pooh-poohed this a little at first, but she admitted she was on the point of fainting from the whole incident (i.e., pain).

She had been in the goat shed when she'd fallen (trying to get something for Emily stored in the rafters), so had goat feces all over her. Between this and her arm and miscellaneous scrapes and bruises, she was a mess and refused to go up to the hospital without changing her clothes first. We were able to get her changed with all of us helping (and sometimes hurting), finally, but it was clearly a rough time for her. Mother also convinced her to call Tim (my brother) and let him know what was going on. At first she "didn't want to bother him unless it turned out to be serious".

The x-ray showed she had a fracture but because she'd broken the same elbow years ago, they had her seen by an orthopod to figure out which fractures were old and which were new. They told her she'd have to have surgery, but needed a CT scan to clearly show what was going on. From what we know at this time, she broke off the radial head (the bottom bone of the forearm where it attaches at the elbow joint to the humerus, or upper arm bone). It sounds as though she'll need to have it pinned, etc., but we won't know for sure until we get the official results of the CT on Monday.

Poor kid, she's in so much pain. It's times like this that I feel SO helpless and wish I could do more than recommend ice, elevation and pain meds every four hours around the clock for twenty four hours. Please pray for her. She has a 4yo daughter, as well as a 19yo and 15yo. Josie, the 19yo is able to help out extensively, thankfully, but poor Ben, the 15yo is up in Canada staying with cousins. Anyway we're thankful it wasn't much worse (like her back, which would have been devastating since she's also injured it extensively when she was a child) and feel the need to thank the Lord Jesus for this mercy.

The joy of a Vocation

I recently started a job at the University of Illinois, in which I am taking the place of an Academic Professional who is having surgery and will be out several weeks. I work for Dr. Benita Katzenellenbogen who is one of the premiere researchers in the effects of estrogen on Breast Cancer. It is a joy to work for someone who is making such a difference in so many thousands of peoples' lives. I mainly do clerical work, but it is interesting and requires me to use my brain, not just do mindless grunt-work.

Dr. K., as her staff and students call her, is a perfectionist to the nth degree. I've found that the person whose place I'm taking has found it difficult to work for her and that others also have had this problem, but I like the work! Perhaps it's because I'm a perfectionist as well, and that I've worked with many physicians who were also perfectionists. I just enjoy trying to do my best and finding that it is appreciated by Dr. K. I'm glad to be where I am and can't help praying that I'll be able to keep the job (that her AP will decide to retire, etc., not that I'll make her lose her job!). I would still like to do nursing part-time, but really long for this job to become permanent.

Brennan Hawkins recovery

"People say that the heavens are closed and God no longer answers prayers. We are here to unequivocally tell you that the heavens are not closed, prayers are answered and children come home," said Brennan's mother, Jody Hawkins. (Mother of 11yo boy recovered in Utah wilderness.)

Just was really touched by this quote. What an example of God's love and grace. He doesn't always answer prayers in the way we want, but He ALWAYS gives us the strength and grace to get through even the worst pain, suffering and loss.

A Setback

Please pray for my sister-at-heart, Michele, who has struggled with a neurological disorder which has been extremely difficult to diagnose. She'd been doing much better in recent weeks, but in the past day or so has started having the symptoms again. I think it must be pretty devastating to believe your healed of an illness (or it least close to it) than have it recur.

Pray that she might have a sense of the Lord's nearness and His deep and intense, personal love for her. Pray, too, for the family, since it will be difficult for them, as well. They've been discouraged with this illness for a few months now and I know they must feel so lost and alone right now. May they have a deeper, fuller sense of their Heavenly Father's love and know He desires to bless them despite this hardship. Pray they have the strength to continue in their walk, and that God grant's them the grace they need to overcome. I love you guys very much, Steve & Michele!

(Click on this entry's title to see more on Steve's website)

God's timing vs. Coincidence

I've been impressed today by the Spirit's work in bringing a passage of scripture to my mind today. This morning I received a lovely note from a virtual stranger who had commented on photos that were posted on another URL-->http://www.flickr.com/photos/48889100198@N01/). This person, by way of encouraging me, made a reference to Elijah and his battle with fear in the wilderness, when he felt completely alone.

I was touched by his words, but was even more impressed when I began reading a word by a brother in the Lord, the late Norman Meek, who gave an address while at a Bible Conference in my hometown in 1981. I picked up the book which contained the address out of idle curiosity but felt a real sense of the Spirit working when I began reading and found it was about Elijah and his struggle with fear in the wilderness. Mr. Meek points out this fear occurs almost immediately after Elijah had seen, in faith, a manifestation of God coming in, in the way of blessings raining down from heaven. He says, “Elijah’s had been a remarkable stand, a fearless stand. God had blessed it. And now, Elijah detects a sound of an abundance of rain, that is, a ministry of blessing. We always need, dear brethren, to look for that.” “Raising the Level and Other Ministry-N.T.M” Pg. 313 Published by G. J. Richards.

He also speaks, in the same address, of how Elijah passed his mantle to Elisha, than continues his walk without turning back, still feeling alone and despondent. Mr. Meek wonders whether Elijah would have heard the sound of running feet as Elisha came to him and what his feelings would have been; the joy in his heart as he wonders whether Elisha will take up the mantle given to him, through Elijah, by God. He ends the address with the following, in reference to the older generation of believers, “Have they cause for any comfort? Is there cause for any joy? Well, dear brethren, I think there may be the sound of the abundance of rain, the latter rain that will fill up the crop, so that when the Lord comes there will be something that will just answer to His heart. And then may there also be in our localities, perhaps not running too fast yet, the sound of these running feet in young brothers and sisters, for the Lord’s names’ sake.” Pg. 319 December 25, 1981

Finally, when I was looking for another passage tonight, while writing another entry, I opened my Bible to the following verses in James 5:end of v. 16-18, “The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore fruit.”

Some might call these three incidences coincidence, but all I can say is, "Wow!" How can I not be impressed with this evidence of God’s love as He trys to bring me into deeper relationship with Himself? I feel humbled and a little shaky, with an intense longing to know exactly what it is He would have me learn from these words. Pray for me in this, please. May you, too, have a sense of the Lord’s blessing in them!

Oswald Chambers quote

I was really moved when reading the monthly "Voice of the Martyrs" magazine (http://www.persecution.com/) this past week. There was a quote from Oswald Chambers in it which made me really think. It was, "God does not give us an overcoming life--He gives us life as we overcome."

I've never been a big fan of Mr. Chambers writing (to my shame, as I can see now). I felt, in the past when attempting to read his work, he was too rigid, legal and somewhat cold in his perceptions of Christ (speaking more about righteousness than of His love and grace). Clearly I've done him a disservice and will pursue reading his work.

I was touched by this quote because it spoke to my heart in my current situation in life. I'm so apt to pray for guidance, wisdom and 'a spirit of overcoming' without wanting to do the work needed to "keep on, keepin' on" as a friend of mine says. The part I tend to overlook is my need to keep my eyes Christ-ward and do the best I can to walk "worthily of the calling by which I've been called", as it says in scripture. When I focus only on my life and the worries that are so apt to surround it, than I become overwhelmed and cannot overcome. Yet, if by His grace, I am able to keep walking "in the light, as He is in the light", no matter what darkness may surround me, when I look up, my sight is filled with the beauty of His holiness and I no longer see darkness, just light. There is a clarity about this; lovely in it’s simplicity.

One might argue, "But if you're looking upward and into the Light all of the time, you must stumble because you cannot see your feet!" Yet there is a scripture from Jude's letter that is an excellent reply and has been a comfort to me for many years. The verse is a loving benediction which says, "Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy, to the only God, our Saviour, through Jesus Christ, our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen" Jude 1:24,25

This passage has given me hope and encouragement during the darkest times of my life. Only by walking in His light and knowing the peace of His infinite love and mercy towards us, can we walk in the Way that leads to life, through overcoming. So we all can be overcomers. What joy!

Eragon

My nephew, Keegan, recommended a really excellent book which has been out for a while but I'd not yet read. I read it yesterday and found it to be one of the best books I've read in its genre. It's comparable to JRR Tolkein's and CS Lewis' books (Lord of the Rings and The Narnia Chronicles), but I find it especially interesting because it was written by a fifteen year old home-schooler. It's one of those books one reads which makes one feel as though one could never write anything like it; it's somewhat discouraging, but also awe-inspiring.

The book is much better, in my opinion, then the Potter series. It has magic in it, but not so strong a focus on "dark magic". The only part which bothered me a bit, initially, was a witch he incorporated into the story. I felt better, tho', when I found out "Angela", the witch, was meant to be a satire of his older sister, Angela. Anyway, it's a sweet story, vibrantly told with incredible detail and wonderful vocabulary. I highly recommend it, especially for readers who enjoy the Tolkein trilogy. I was really blown away at the thought of a person so young writing so beautifully. The book's web-site is: http://www.randomhouse.com/teens/eragon/

New blog in the Oberg menagerie

Check out the latest blogger in the Oberg family! It's really cool. It's at ozwick.blogspot.com